Blurbs from the Burbs by Chickysara

Overheard while driving: J: When I grow up I’m going to drive an AC Cobra. T: Why? J: Because it's fast. And I’m going to ride my girlfriend around in it. T: Can I ride around in it too? J: Nope. It’s a two-seater and there’s no room for you. T: Why J? I wanna ride with you. J: Well, you’ll have to ride in the trunk. And I'm going to throw my backpack and my lunchbox in there with you. T: That’s okay. I’ll put your backpack under my head. Like a pillow! J: Well, you’ll prob’ly smell my lunch because my lunchbox is inside my backpack. T: J, why won’t you ride me around in your AC Cobra? Anyways, you like boys more than you like girls. J: ...You’re right…okay...you can sit in the front. I’ll throw the girlfriend in the trunk.

I am engulfed in chaos. It is the onset of the pre-holiday madness that happens every year no matter how I hard I try to avoid it. This year, I confess, I did not try. There are many things going on over which I have no control so I have given up on trying and have decided to embrace the chaos. I’ve hung the decorations and put up a tree but I am not tending to details like baking or “correcting” Christmas light snafus. There is an entire bottom of a bush that is naked of Christmas lights. The Husband and I definitely don’t follow the same Christmas Light Hanging Code. He’s okay with tossing a few lights on a few random bushes, but I want to be able to see my house from space. I overheard him complaining to the neighbor that the only thing saving him from spending more than an hour hanging lights are the ones that won’t light up which he gleefully tosses. I wonder if he crushes those tiny bulbs between his fingers just so he can throw out the whole string (he wouldn't!--would he?)...